Category Archives: Work

Life Lessons of the Week

1. The stress of party planning is a fair and decent excuse for verbally abusing a cashier. 2. If you are driving home, and you think that a tree is a Ferris wheel, you should maybe take that as a … Continue reading

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Breakfast.

Oh, you don’t want advice from me; I ate a Three Musketeers bar for breakfast. ~Liz Lemon I was quite the responsible citizen, breakfast-wise, for a while at my new job. I genuinely love oatmeal, and not even the kind … Continue reading

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Why I Could Not Be Expected To Show Up On Time For Work This Morning

1. Chip disturbing sleep by somehow setting off alarm clock at 3 a.m. 2. Dr. von Rockenstein scratching at window all night like vampire brother in “Salem’s Lot.” 3. David Lee Roth airing call from casino owner, making me think … Continue reading

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Things I Am Just Not In The Mood For Today

1. Giggling, squealing, and/or baby talk. If I am going to be subjected to coquettish behavior, then Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh had damn well better be involved. 2. Strong arming by my iPod. Seriously, I have 500 songs on … Continue reading

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Weak Conversation

I think I have finally reached my breaking point with the whole talking about what day it is thing. Holy crap! Like office chatter isn’t supremely irritating enough, especially if you are given to misanthropic tendencies. But this week is … Continue reading

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2:30 Awww

So as some of you may know, I’ve been suffering from a terrible toothache that began midway through my cruise. This has been held at bay over the past week, to varying degrees of success, by: 4 different prescription painkillers, … Continue reading

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Things That Have Already Traumatized Me Today

1. Being woken up by my alarm. For the past few weeks, I have awoken to Shannon, calling me to do yoga. However, last night she stayed up until 2:30 a.m., and therefore did not have a voice this morning. … Continue reading

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Life Lessons of the Week

1. If you discover that it’s snowing outside, even though it’s almost April, put on your headphones and blast “Open Arms” by Journey. Works like a charm. 2. Going to visit one of your best friends in the hospital after … Continue reading

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My Kingdom For A Coffee

The vending machine promised me a tasteful blend of coffee and chocolate in my Cafe Mocha, but this is neither tasteful nor chocolatey. Nor coffee-y, for that matter. This is what happens when I run out of money and can’t … Continue reading

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Stupid Tuesday

I hate Tuesdays. There is no redeeming quality to them. At least on Monday, you are still kind of going on weekend momentum, and have theoretically gotten a couple extra hours of sleep. Plus, you know. The communal Monday bemoaning. … Continue reading

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