Author Archives: judisunshine

Sunflowers and Snow

I’d like to be my old self again, but I’m still trying to find it. Taylor Swift I wish I’d done everything on Earth with you. F. Scott Fitzgerald (Spoiler warning for the Open Water movies) I used to write … Continue reading

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And that’s how I choose to remember it. ~Rilo Kiley I don’t remember why I picture my grandparents’ backyard, the way I do. There were tall rows of corn. His garden was beautiful. Even as a kid I related more … Continue reading

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Cindy Lubbock’s Radio Show

One day, I’ll write another blog about funny things again. But today and others haven’t been those days. And I miss writing. I started blogging in the first place because I wanted to be a voice in the night, like … Continue reading

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Boxer Shorts

It was a sunny day in 1993. My mom was sitting next to her mom on one of those bubbly pool chairs at Smuggler’s Notch in Vermont. She was horrified by my outfit. Do you remember that episode of “Major … Continue reading

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Dead Bodies and Bloated Heads

Do you know how many times I’ve thought of dying? Because there are so many. The first time I ever truly thought about killing myself was in the bathroom of my parents’ house back in 1997. I was 22. Then … Continue reading

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I Don’t Want To.

One of my favorite scenes ever is from “Felicity’s” “The List.” After a year of pining for Ben and finally getting to be with him, she realizes how much of herself she’s been compromising, just to not “freak him out.” … Continue reading

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Mixing Up the Routine

One reason I love yoga is that it reminds me of cheerleading. Including a downside, which is how when I first try a routine, I can’t keep up and am like omg I’ll never get this, and everyone is smart … Continue reading

Posted in Apartments & Other Domiciles, Body Image, Miscellaneous, Sports, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Wild Nights

[Books] were the world I could lose myself in when the one I was actually living in became too lonely or harsh or difficult to bear. I considered my options. There were only two and they were essentially the same. … Continue reading

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Shadows & Sunlight

Normally if I leave the office in the first place, it’s to go to Target or Safeway. Those are in a long row of stores where if you walk on the sidewalk, you’re in a shadow. When it’s cold, it … Continue reading

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I Am Hannah Baker (With Less Gorgeous Skin).

As I try to digest/get through “13 Reasons Why,” I’m realizing why I didn’t binge it through in the first place. It’s an ugly mirror. There is a part where amidst the saintifying of Hannah because she’s dead, someone says … Continue reading

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