Monthly Archives: August 2011

Why I never!…? Part 2!

Click here for Part One! A Woman Over 30 Should Never: 16. Go braless, no matter her cup size. Heh. Well, going braless is a great dream of mine, but alas. Though technically, I have some corset-style shirts that I … Continue reading

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Why, I Never!…?

So recently at Borders, I came across this: And since I am a masochist, I decided to buy it, and see how I measure up. But first, let me share with you an intro so horrifying, they may as well … Continue reading

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A Thin Line Between Whee And Oops

I suck at sports. I mean I really suck. I’m athletic, and surprisingly strong. I was a cheerleader for six years, and can be coordinated. I can even do things that just require hitting things and running around, like racquetball … Continue reading

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The One Spice Girl I Am Not

Many times, people will ask me about sports. Or they will try to engage me in conversations about sports. Or — and this is the worst offense of all — they will invite me over to ostensibly hang out together … Continue reading

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Runaway Twain

I’ve had a knack from way back of breaking the rules once I learned the game. ~Mimi As many of you know, I’m not so much a fan of “authority,” or “structure,” or “rules.” I am a people pleaser, and … Continue reading

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Junior Low :'(

In eighth grade I loved a boy who, alas, loved another. His code name was Herbie, so that is what I shall call him here today. During this tumultuous time, I wrote a song about my sadness, called “Fading Shadows”: All … Continue reading

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Little Orphan Annie and My Grandmother

When I was seven years old, I was OBSESSED with “Annie.” My grandmother, Mary Byrnes Collins, introduced me to the Broadway record, and I was never the same. “Annie” was my love, my life. I hadn’t seen the play or … Continue reading

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Awkward.

From Bridget Jones’s Diary: (Her uncle): Come on, let’s get you a drink. How’s your love life, anyway? (Bridget (to herself)): Oh God. Why can’t married people understand that this is no longer a polite question to ask? We wouldn’t … Continue reading

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Maui Crispness

So back in 1997, my family took a trip to HAWAII!!! ™The Brady Bunch. It was an amazing time. We were there for ten days. The first five I spent bike riding down a volcano at the crack of dawn, … Continue reading

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Magic Mirrors, Magic Mushroom Kids

In August 1980, when I was almost five years old, I was on “Romper Room” for a week. Not the Miss Molly one, the Miss Mary Anne one. She was I think, the second host(ess) of the show? Either way, … Continue reading

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